If only

Have you ever noticed how many ''if onlys'' you have had...which were not fulfilled...!
How you plan out so many things ...your studies, your family, your career and how it never ends the way you wanted..how life just has its own way...

Well..this is what is given the name luck..the unforeseen that controls our life..whats going to happen..! I remember how I wished to be the topper in my school days, if only i had the brains, i could prove to be the best daughter ever.
Later came the if only where i wanted to look so beautiful..if only i had those perfect stats I could have any guy i wanted, anyone and everyone would be envious of me. Then came the entrance exams, i wished sooooooo hard to be in IIT..my dream college a dream that was shattered so bad..getting me into a private college.
Life is full of so many surprises or rather shocks and i have had my share for sure. I mean there were things I couldn't imagine my life without, I had prayed, wished, begged and nothing that I had planned for myself ever took shape. The feeling that I can't control what's gonna happen, just have to follow someone else's plans, who perhaps knows what's better for me, just lingers.

But then, now that come to think of it, could I actually handle getting what i wanted for myself..! I mean getting into IIT is one thing and surviving there is another and how much does it even matter now, when i have secured a satisfying job for myself. I mean now getting the big picture, i am just stupefied with what was all the fuzz about. And then coming over to the dreamy guy who would have gone for me just for my looks, doesn't sound that perfect to me now and well getting better grades..thats just a childhood fetish. And so on goes the list of so many things that i had longed for in the past, which were so crucial to me at one point in my life, seem baseless.

So all in all whenever that "if only" crosses your mind and you are not getting what you had deep desires for, just know that that is how it is intended to be and there is someone who really knows the best for you.!